It's been rough lately

This particular holiday season has been full of unhappy events.  First we lost our dear friend Cora to cancer, and due to a lack of communication from a variety of people, we missed her viewing and a chance to be there for her father on a rough day.

A week to the day, and almost exact time of day, our Maine Coon kitten died unexpectedly at home. He was not yet 2 years old. The analysis to this point is that he died of a heart attack as the vet didn't find anything else. Unfortunately for my dear hubby, it happened while he was home alone and caused him great distress.  Our big-fluffy-large pawed-chirpy-dooropener is already greatly missed.

Christmas was a bit more fun. I got to spend it with a dear friend and her family, along with two really cute, energetic kids. And my family actually called me. So I was thinking, silly me, that we might be looking at an upswing in our lives.  Nope. Another dear friend is having a tragic day tomorrow, having to put down his beloved old 18 year old cat. And another friend lost a beloved Aunt today.

This made me have a chat with God. She will occasionally answer me. Mostly she just shrugs things off and says to talk to Merie instead. She actually answered me this time around.  Her answer: "That's Life sweetie." Damn bitch! She truly has a warped sense of humor. Even Merie had to smile a bit when I ranted at her about her bitch of a boss lady.

The only good news out of this chat, was I got bit more of the Merie story done. Now I just need more time to work on my blog pages, and get a break from work-work on my vacation.

Halloween Magic - a.k.a. Visting with Pop

I was talking with Pop, my grandfather, the other night. It's a bit more difficult than one may expect. You see, Pop died back in 2000. That doesn't stop me from visiting with him though. In order to do so I must be very tired, very stressed out, very much missing him, and very much asleep. I figured, with Halloween rapidly approaching, it was high time he came for a visit, and perhaps would be a fun little story to share with you all – if he'd just cooperate!

Not everyone in my family can do this, but it is most definitely an inherited trait. My mom talks to Maga (her mother) often, as does her sister. No, I'm not a psychic, it's just one of those odd things that my quirky family can do and we don't really think about. I can only do this with family that I had a special connection to, so please don't ask if I can talk to your relatives for you.

Pop loved all of his grandkids equally, although each of us had our own special relationship with him; our's was a particularly tight and honest one. Pop always gave me good, practical, honest - and often brutal – advice. I miss him daily.

I found Pop in his favorite spot, accompanied by my favorite dogs, John Deere cap in place and a big smile on his tanned face. He loves this spot, and it's definitely the farm of his dreams. I hadn't seen the dogs with him in some time, so I knew he picked up on the fact that I was more than a bit peeved. After hugs and scratches to all my pups, we plopped down on crates to chat.

Me: So ya old-fart, where the hell you been?!

Pop: Hey old woman, glad to see you too. You know I can't always come when you call, it doesn't work like that.

Me: (grumbling a bit) Yeah, yeah, I know. Still doesn't make me any happier. I miss you, ya know. You need to visit me more often.

Pop: I know. So what's got you all worked up? Why're ya here? And what the hell's going on with all those old piece of crap sewing machines you're buying up?

Me: They're not crap and you know it. I like 'em, they're fun to work on, and they cost less than a project car. As for the rest, I've got a test coming up – computer stuff – and I need to finish a re-write of Jess' book. Since you gave her to me, I figure you're the best one to talk to about this.

Pop: I don't get it. Hasn't she told you what to write?

Me: Yep, but I keep getting the same advice about her language over and over. And of course Rosie has to chime in about 'proper' language and not to write 'such filth'.

Pop: Aw, hell! Tell Rosie to quit getting her bloomers in a bunch! So Jess swears; it's just the way she is. You know, she's a lot like you and I know you swear just as badly.

(He's right, I do)

Me: Don't I know it! But she gives me a head ache when I change her language. It's mostly the f-bomb that people take issue with. Hell, Mom won't even read it.

Pop: You know your Mom's a smart lady, maybe you should listen to her – a little bit. And take that writer friend of yours advice; don't drop it right off the start, but let her work up to a good outburst.

Me: (sighing) Okay, okay. I'll listen to everyone's advice. I'm working on it but it's kind of hard...I'm eating Excedrin like it's candy!

Pop: (laughing) Yep, that Jess' is a firecracker. Tell that pretty blond writer friend of yours that if I was alive and a lot younger, I'd be more'n happy to show her a good time!

Me: Will you always be a cute old letch?

Typical Pop, always with an eye out for a pretty girl!  Still, I love our visits - even when he acts like an old letch.

 

Of Family Matters

It's been a busy month on the in-law side of things. First an Uncle passed, then my mother-in-law's best friend, followed shortly by my mother-in-law and then a "dog-in-law". (Hubby's Aunt's Goldie). Lots and lots to deal with none of it much too happy.

Due to this my characters have been uncharacteristically quiet of late. They're still there, ready to cause chaos in my head at a moment's notice, but they seem to understand I need time to deal with things and won't have much time to write yet. Or perhaps they know about the impending layoffs and are waiting to pounce once I'm on the unemployment line. Who knows? They do have minds of their own; which I find utterly fascinating.

Then today, I get told about a dinner table discussion about some responses I had to things my nephew's posted on a social media site. Jess had a bit of a hissy fit, not a long one, but a rant that would make a sailor blush during this conversation. (Granted, she's right, I haven't sat down to dinner with these people in at least 5 years). They aren't children either, they're both over 18. It's funny (in an odd way) that they even complained about it. First off, isn't the rule of thumb don't post anything on the internet that you don't want people to see? And second rule of thumb, if you can't take the heat of a response that you don't agree with, don't post stuff to the internet? Or perhaps I'm just showing my age as I've been on the "Internet" since back in the old ARPANET and FLASH days.

Anyway, it got me to thinking about how odd my family can truly be and how I SO don't fit their "expectations" of who I should be at all. Which may explain why my sister has now lost 5 copies of my book that she's supposed to be editing.

Which, in turn, brings me to the family I have built for myself, a.k.a. "The Family". It's an eclectic mix of very fun, wonderful, loving and accepting people. We don't have to see each other often to know we care about each other or to know what's going on in each other's lives. We treasure the time we have together and have great fun when we are together. And these are the people who step forward to help out on a moment's notice when tragedy hits and I unexpectedly need help in any number of ways. There are no expectations, no demands, just simple offers of assistance. And I happily do the same for them.

What does all of this have to with writing? Well, I've given up on asking my family for an honest evaluation of my writing. Instead I'm going to The Family to ask people for opinions, criticism, and input on my book. And I'm hoping to gain more insight from a new writer's group (well, new to me anyway) from people that aren't "family" and will not hesitate to give an honest opinion. Which in turn means this entire process is going to take a lot longer and I will hopefully learn a TON about writing, whether it be for pleasure or profit.

At any rate, I'm sure Jess will jump in at some point, demanding attention and kicking my virtual butt to get back to work on her storyline. And I really can't wait I do have such fun jumping into her world.