Queerify-ing the Beastie

My new truck has only been with me a few days, hasn't had 100 miles put on it yet, and has only had Country music playing in it so far.  It's still got a long way to earn the status of "Bubba Truck #2", so is nicknamed "the beastie" for now. It hasn't even hauled a load of anything yet.  I decided today was the day to make it truly mine.

I pulled out my Adam Lambert CD and offered up the "virgin" CD player to his first album. I have to love the man. First, he's got an amazing rock voice, is huge sexy, and comes from the one place I truly feel home, San Diego county.  Top that off with the fact that he is openly gay, and I'm an big fan. 

As soon as the first tune started spilling out of the speakers Jess' BFF Paul hopped into my head, making the transition to his Drag Queen self in no time and singing along with me. I had to laugh at all the chaos in going on in my head, Jess was stating that real trucks only play country music, while Paul/Jolita insisted that true allies are open to any kind of music in their trucks and the rest of their crew danced around my head like the Grateful Dead bears.

Popping on my bluetooth headset I made a call to my BFF and left him the following voice mail: "I've queerified the new beastie...I'm playing Adam Lambert in it."

On my way home he called me back, saying the dog told him I'd called. I repeated the message and he laughed along with me. Only I would think to properly queerify my vehicle, but then I am an odd duck, and at a minimum I made my dear friend laugh.

Best part is Jess just gave me the plot changes for book #4 so it's time to write!

Ah, at last!

I have a break. An unplanned one that started out a little stressed, but is wrapping up fairly quickly. The nice thing is I will have time to sit and write for a long stretch at last.

Paul has been bugging me to hurry up and finish up the second book in the Jess Barker series, so I can get on to "his" book in the series. Jess, in the meantime, has been harrassing me to hurry up and finish edits on the first book and hit up more agents.

The Scot is patiently waiting in the wings, while I do more research. Merie has been unusually quiet, while Collie has been chattering like crazy of late. I think it has something to do with the weather as she's not happy about the weird weather pattern we've been having. I, however, have been loving it!

Jess and Paul will be appeased. There is a competition coming up that I think fits Jess pretty well. I'll be checking into that tomorrow and see if it's a good fit for Jess' book or not. I'm crossing my fingers that it is.

An Interview with Jess

I was debating about whether or not to post the first chapter of some of my books on my blog. So, as usual, I went to my writer's group – Grand Rapids Region Writers Group – with the question. There was some difference of opinion, but Simone Anderson answered the question I hadn't asked.

So, I'm not posting chapters here. Why? Because it is possible that a publisher may consider the work “published” and may not pick it up. Since I haven't decided if I'm going to self-publish yet (I'm still trying the traditional route of finding an agent) I decided to heed Simone's advice.

Her advice included the idea of posting interviews with (or of) my characters. Or at least that's how Jess has interpreted it and she hasn't shut up about being interviewed ever since. To ease my aching head and shut Jess up for awhile, I agreed to interview her.

So, with no further ado, here's my first ever interview with Jess Barker from the Jess Barker Mystery series. Hopefully it's not too silly and you may get a good giggle. And I've warned Jess that if she swears there will be a [bleep] posted as I'm trying to keep this blog somewhat G-rated.

JC:     Welcome Jess! So, how about telling everyone what's it's like to be you?

Jess:   What it's like to be me? How the [bleep] do you think it feels to be followed around by a bunch of dead people that won't leave you alone? It's kind of like being Tori Spelling when she's pregnant and the paparazzi are following her non-stop. Only no one can see my 'paparazzi' because they're frickin' dead and mine have the added "'bonus" of being able to follow me into the bathroom stall.

JC:      Ooookay....uhm, I did warn you I'd have to verbally “bleep” you, remember?

Jess:    Oh, so now you're going to play like you're a saint? You know your mouth is as bad as mine.

JC:      (I'm trying hard not to chuckle here) No, I'm not playing the saint here. Everyone who knows me, knows I can swear with the best of 'em.

Jess:   Fine. (she's pouting)

JC:     Wanna tell them anything else?

Jess:   Nope.

JC:     Sure?

Jess:   Positive. You're not doing this way I wanted you to, ya know. (she's still pouting)

Jess:   Quit being a [bleep] and telling them everything I'm doing or I'm walking sister!

JC:     All right, all right! Geez, you're grouchy tonight. What's wrong?

Jess:   I'm tired! My horrible boss made us all work overtime, and my dead groupies whined all night at me about paying attention to them so I haven't slept in over 24 hours.

JC:    Sorry. I know how grouchy they can make you. How about we talk about your work instead?

Jess:   'K. My actual work is pretty boring. The bad part is I work in a hospital so I'm always on alert to ignore the dead running around there. It's a bit tough because my two best girlfriend's work there too, and they don’t know about my stupid cursed gift.

JC:    So, from your point of view, interacting with the dead the way you do is a curse?

Jess:  Yes. A curse. Definitely.

JC:     Is there anything about work you do like?

Jess:   The good thing about work is that Maggie works with me and we get to see Cora fairly often. On occasion, I even get a long enough break to meet Paul for lunch.

JC:     Why don't you tell everyone about those three?.

Jess:   Well, Paul and I met in college. He's like my brother and sister all rolled into one. He's been my BFF since the first day we met. I mean, who doesn't love a good Drag Queen? Maggie is a genuine sweetheart, gorgeous inside and out and she always knows when I'm arriving at work, it's a bit unsettling. And Cora, well, she's feisty, a fighter, and a bit of a cougar. She's always got an eye on some cute young guy.

Cora:   Now wait just a minute! I am NOT a cougar.

JC:      Well, hello Cora, Maggie, Paul. Nice of you to join us. Is this the way it's always going to be? I try to interview Jess and you three jump on in?

Paul:    Oh, quit it. You love us all and you know it. (Paul grins as he plants kisses on our cheeks)

Maggie:  Hi, JC! You know perfectly well that wherever Jess is we're not too far behind. Someone's gotta keep her on the sober train.

Cora:   Seriously! I'm not a cougar. I'm forty, fit, and fabulous. What man in his right mind wouldn't want me?

Paul:   Well, me doll. You're just not my type. You know you don't have the 'right parts' for me. (Cora sticks her tongue out at him making him laugh)

JC:      Enough you two. C'mon you guys. I'm trying to interview Jess and it's becoming a three-ring circus (like usual) in here!

Maggie:   We're sorry. What else did you want to know?

Jess:     Aw, [bleep]! Give it up JC. We're done here. Let's take this circus on the road and go get something to eat. I'm starving and want something chocolate!

JC:       Fine. But I get dibs on the hot fudge!

Sorry folks, this is what goes on in my head on a routine basis. Welcome to my world!

Jess & Paul - A Brief History

Jess is my first character - and the one to start all this writing. She makes me laugh, cry, swear, and get blazing mad. I love her anyway and enjoy visiting her world.

Paul is her BFF. They met in college and have been inseparable ever since. Paul is a stockbroker, but is not out at work, and he's a Drag Queen (a Diva really), who not only looks fabulous is a dress and heels but has an incredible singing voice to back them up. It broke his heart to let Jess fall as far as she did, but he knew it was necessary to save her life.

Jess never blamed Paul for her fall, and is grateful that he let her go. She needed the fall to be able to come back, stronger in her sobriety and determined to get her life back on track. Her's is a complicated life, but she's thankful to still have it.

Jess will always be two things: first, a recovering alcoholic, and second, a psychic and she's not particularly fond of her "gift". Jess sees dead people, but not like other psychics. She can see them, touch them, talk to them, and they can respond in the same way. This has resulted in some painful encounters and some interesting battles when one of the dead insists on "borrowing" her body.

Her best girls, Molly and Maggie are also AA lifers, both work at the local hospital with Jess and aren't fully aware of her gift. Molly's a social worker - also a recovering alcoholic and former stockbroker. Maggie works as a billing coder with Jess in the bowels of the hospital.

There's always a hoard of dead clamoring for Jess' attention following her around and new ones pop up at the most inconvenient times. She's managed to corral most of them in her apartment, but every once in awhile one sneaks out. Rosie, a warm grandmotherly type, is one that can find Jess anywhere, and who Jess occassionally calls on for help from time to time. She's almost like Jess' spirit guide, almost, but not quite. Then there's Melissa, the constant whiner who makes Jess throw shoes through her semi-transparent head when she's pushed Jess too far Rosie chastises Jess on a regular basis about her language. Jess can make a drunken sailor blush with her swearing.

I hate to give out much more information than this as I'd like to have people read the book. One which Jess is insisting i need to get published soon...especially since a few of the other characters are insisting on their own story lines now too.

Stay tuned for a few more sneak peeks, and I may be putting some short side stories out on B&N or Amazon sometime soon.